At Long Last

I feel like it's been ages since I last posted a note. Actually it has been. It's been a tough few months. Morning sickness and fatigue was and continues to be the ever present prevailing experience of my first and now second trimester. I continue to hold on to this ending soon. The good news is the only part of this experience that has been challenging has been the physical part. I feel great, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. Despite the massive amounts of hormones swirling through my body, I haven't been experiencing any of the emotional roller coaster usually associated with pregnancy. No if only I could sneeze without holding my crotch so I don't tinkle a little. Speaking of sneezing, I caught a cold on Sunday, it's a pretty bad one too. Headache, chest congestion, sore throat, coughing. Yuck! I am supposed to go in for a procedure that checks for any defects or problems with the babies tomorrow (Amniocentesis), but I'm not sure it's such a good idea. Unfortunately with my health plan (Kaiser) it can be pretty difficult to get a hold of the doctor to find out if I should reschedule my appointment. I also have another appointment with my OB/Gyn on Thursday so I should have a more up to date picture of the babies. I have put one up from a few weeks ago of one of the babies. The other one seemed to be a little camera shy and we couldn't get a very good picture. I should be able to tell the sex of the babies very soon. I am also posting a picture of my big belly. Which I think looks huge for 15 weeks, but who knows.

I want to apologize for not staying in touch and not keeping everyone in the loop. After all, you are family. I just kept saying to myself, "as soon as I feel better, I will start reaching out." I know I am doing the best I can, but I miss you guys! Several people have been reaching out to me and although at times it takes me a while to get back to them I truly appreciate it. It makes me feel thought of and loved.

Although I know pretty soon I am going to need a lot of help, I have been thinking about what that really means. As I mentioned in my 2nd year project, what I really want for myself and my children is a community. I want all the diversity and experiences that comes from such a wonderful group of people that we are. For me it's less about asking for help and more about wanting to have my kids learn about and be exposed to things I couldn't possible know about myself. So as much as you would like to be involved, I would like to have you. On a practical note, as for help, I will start getting clearer at to what I need as time goes on. I am also excited to hear how people would like to be involved. I'm talking about everything: pre, birth and post. My mom has been fantastic too and a huge support for me. Despite being a very strong minded mother, she has exhibited a great deal of restraint and has been focusing on what I want not what she thinks I need. Wow. Big break through.

I feel like I have so much more to say, but I think I have expended my quota of energy for the day. Damn and I still have to go to work tonight. Sigh. I guess this is just practice. I promise I will write more often. I know most of you are not able to get notification of my blog posting directly, so I will send out an email letting you know when I post something. If you don't want this notification, please let me know and I will take you off the list. Or if you are not on my list and have stumbled on this blog accidentally or through someone else I can add you.

Love, love, love,
Kathryn

Second Ultrasound

I had my second Ultrasound on Wednesday and everything is still looking very good. Both babies are growing and have heartbeats. One is .8cm and the other is 1.08cm. See the picture on the right! I'm still feeling sick almost all the time, but I am managing it and living in the knowledge that it won't last forever.

I'm going to be at USM this weekend reading for the Second Year Class and am really looking forward to being in the energy field again. So many of you have expressed a desire to help and be supportive and I have no doubt that I will be taking you up on that very soon. Stay tuned as things progress. I love you and miss you.

xoxo,
Kathryn

My First Ultrasound

I went in for my first Ultrasound today and it was amazing. I am still in shock. It was amazing hearing the heartbeats...yes that is plural. Two sets of heartbeats. TWINS! I can't believe it. Initially I was afraid this would happen taking fertility medications, then I secretly hoped for it. Now I know it is exactly what is supposed to be happening. I feel so blessed and fully protected. I know this not only what is best for the little ones, but I know it is truly for the highest good of all concerned. I get to experience asking for support and receiving fully.


As for me, I started experiencing morning sickness (more like all day sickness) on January 1st. So far it's just mild nausea. Eating small frequent meals really seems to help. Oh and Lime Fruit Floes from Trader Joes really help too.


Thank you for your continued love, light, prayers, thoughts and blessings. I feel like it is the air that I breath.


More to come later...until then big kiss.

The Big News

Well, I peed on a stick (actually 5) and it's official I'M PREGNANT! I had a blood test today to confirm and check to see if my HCG hormones are at the right level. I won't get the results until tomorrow, but I guess I just couldn't wait to tell you all. It seems appropriate that I began reading this weekend for the 2nd year class at USM and as I was sitting there basking in the awesome energy and reading a particularily amazing Self-Counseling paper, I felt some strange activity in my uterus and I'm certain that is when the implantation happened. The next leg of the journey has begun. I don't really feel much different yet except that I was in the prepared foods section of Whole Foods and a smell there really hit me and made me a little nauseous (although that can happen regardless). I know I have ages to go, but I have already been calling Kaiser to check on my coverage and health insurance benefits. I know I'm not actually out of the wood, but I feel like Spirit is fully supporting me on my journey, however that unfolds. Thanks for reading and supporting. I love you.